Cultivate Curiosity

Have you ever watched a toddler play?  They are naturally curious, engaged, and motivated to explore.  But what happens when we push them, persuade them, or pressure them to learn things?  Quite often we quench this natural, inbuilt learning model.

Sadly, most young moms feel that they have to buy expensive programs, educational toys and books and DVDs to keep their children motivated and learning.  Moms, you can relax.  Your child will learn so much if you give them opportunities to explore, discover, and encourage them to learn in their own way.

Provide them with some simple elements and they will be happy for hours ~ let them play outside in nature, play with sand and water, offer them things to pour with or carry, play with playdough, keep a container filled with bottles, empty tubes, etc.  Give them a large sheet to make tents or forts.  And read to them every day.

When your young child learns, they love to repeat, and repeat and repeat the activity.  Once they have mastered that skill or activity, they will move on.  If they are not interested, they will move on.  Follow their lead.

Ask them questions and let them discover … what happens when you put this in the water?  Which objects will float?  How can we pour this into that?  Which object will fit on top?  Hint ~ don’t be a teacher!  Simply behave as a curious and eager participant.

Facilitate their curiosity with new experiences and this will lead to their learning, and be there with them to watch them explore and learn.  E.g.: Spray a blob of shaving cream low enough for them to reach on a large window and let them play!  Put a blob of shaving cream on a plastic table and let them discover how they can make marks, patterns or simply enjoy a sensory experience.  (Although it seems messy, shaving cream wipes off with a damp cloth and smells lovely!)  Let them play with rice in a little paddle pool (so that the mess is relatively contained) and let them fill bowls, bottles, pour into funnels, through cardboard rolls, spoon into cups etc.

What kills a child’s natural curiosity?  A young child’s curiosity withers away with competition, comparison to others, constantly needing or receiving praise and approval, punishment or shame, testing or a sense of a fixed/ right result.  Avoid groups or schools where this is disguised as “motivation”.

Socialization  for young children is important, but does not mean that your preschooler must join a group.  Meet once a week with one like-valued family with children the same ages and this more than enough for your child.  Once a month arrange to go out on a picnic,  or outings to the zoo or petting parks,  or take a ride on a bus, or meet at the local library, or watch puppet shows, etc.  Remember the golden socialization ratio  for young children = their age plus one = your three-year-old can only really cope with 4 friends at a party or group, so don’t overwhelm your young child with too many friends, play dates or groups.

Moms these days are under so much pressure for their child to perform.  Please, don’t do too many other classes (such as music, play ball,  horse riding, gymnastics, ballet, etc.  Please, these are all fine, but not all at once, and not all for a young child ).   I don’t know about you, but my stress levels shoot through the roof when I need to get everyone into the car and arrive somewhere on time everyday!  I would recommend your preschooler takes swimming lessons, but don’t fill your week with endless trips to classes and activities.   When you have several children, watch out for conflicting schedules, or where the whole family are endlessly bundled in and out of cars for one child’s activities.  You should not feel like a taxi driver everyday!

A good rule to guide your junior primary child in joining extra-curricula activities is to choose one sport and one cultural activity for that season.  Some activities are year-long, such as ballet, so then allow one more activity that is compatible with your existing schedule.  Ensure you have at least 1 free day where you can stay home, take your time, be leisurely and relaxed in your schedule.  This freedom encourages curiosity.

When starting your preschool homeschooling, please don’t feel that you need to be formal, strict, and precise in your approach.  Apart from reading aloud together every day, simply create variety in your weekly schedule which may include some of these activities:

• Learn and sing nursery rhymes and Bible songs
• make music
• play and climb
• time in nature
• make-believe games and dressing up
• learning meaningful life skills such as washing up, sorting washing, setting the table, feeding the cat/dog, dusting and polishing furniture, emptying dustbins,
• reading aloud from well-illustrated Children’s Bible and classical children’s stories
• Provide short little lessons where they can sort, group, thread, stack, cut & paste, count, learn their alphabet through phonics, etc.

I hope that these ideas encourage you to relax, trust and enjoy your young child’s natural curiosity.

(Photos of my granddaughter Emma on her first birthday, and with her dad on her second birthday)

Blessings, Nadene

Motivation #3 Turn Those Frowns Upside Down

Today I have refreshed a post from my archives as we revisit posts on motivation ~  see Motivation #1 and Motivation #2, 

We have all had those days, where children frown, have the sulks, shed tears, refuse, delay and procrastinate, whine and complain, throw temper-tantrums, or go so s.l.o.w.

Firstly, assess why a child is unhappy and unmotivated:

1. Is their negativity regular or consistent?
2. Is there a pattern of this behaviour?
3. Does this occur with all subjects or just some?
4. Is the child sick or tired?  
5. Has my child some physical problem that makes the learning difficult? Eyesight? Hearing? Low muscle tone? Any allergies?
6. Is my child too busy?
7. Are we over-scheduled?  Too many activities outside home?
8. What is my child’s preferred learning style?
9. Is my teaching method/ curriculum suited to my child’s learning style?
10. What motivates him/her?  
11. Is the work level too difficult?
12. Am I requiring too much too soon?
13. Are there other underlying emotional problems that frustrate and anger my child?
14. Has the home routine been disrupted? New baby? A move?
15. Is there a loss of regular meal and sleep schedules?
16. Has the child recently been taken out of public school?  Does he/she need un-schooling?
17. What TV/ movies/ music/ peer friends / network group is my child involved in?
18. What are sibling relationships and family relationships like?
19. How much one-on-one time does my child have with parents?
20. Are parents experiencing difficulties?  Financial?  Marital?  Children are very sensitive to even unspoken stresses in the home.

When I assess, I first pray.  Too often my own fears of inadequacy or uncertainty cloud my judgement.  When I pray and journal, the Lord encourages me.  He is my Hope.  His answers are often very simple.

When things are difficult at homeschool, I always talk to my husband.  He is not involved with much of the schooling/ curriculum/ methods/ principles, but he knows me.  He knows our children and he is the Head of our home.  We talk about the problems and possible solutions.  He and I assess together.  He is much more reluctant than I am to seek outside help, but if there are physical issues, we agree together to consult an expert.

Establish the underlying problem and then plan:

1. Start the day with prayer.  Pray together.  Pray for each other.  Pray for strength to face any difficulty.
2. Keep at least 4 days (preferably 1 week) to the BARE ESSENTIALS.  Do not go out!  Do not entertain. Stay at home.
3. Re-introduce the basic routine.  Keep strict sleep times and healthy, happy meals times.
4. Keep school lessons short and sweet.
5. Start with the hardest subject first.
6. Use a different approach – do the work with drama/ movement/ puppet show/ songs/ actions/ fun activities.
7. Have a snack and tea break when desk work (3 R’s) is complete.
8. Continue with one enjoyable discovery subject (geography/ science/ history) per day.  Do it with minimum stress. Use delight-directed studies.
9. Finish school with a song as you pack away.  End the day happily.
10. Have a fun afternoon picnic/ swim/ game/ craft or activity/ go on a nature walk.  No books or work.  Keep it simple and fun.  Let them have free play outdoors.
11. Avoid all TV/ DVDs/ computer games for a week.  Play family games/ read aloud/ listen to classical music/audio books while doing a family collage/ project.
12. Introduce any healthy dietary changes gently if there were bad eating habits.
13. Introduce any therapy with a positive and gentle approach.
14. Be available in the day.  No blogging! Put aside your own activities or plan that the children join you in yours.  (Garden/ cook/ fold laundry together.) 
15. Make bedtime simple, affectionate and whisper encouraging words in your child’s ear.  End the day with gratitude together.  Journal together or privately.  Rejoice over every victory.  

Some encouraging ideas about motivation:

• Sit together with your children and ask them what they really like/
  dislike.  Agree to do even the disliked subjects, but discuss how you can make it enjoyable.
• Plan your timetable together.  Let them choose with you.  Although I plan the subjects and topics, we set up our timetable together.   If we need to do maths, spelling and writing for example, I let them decide which they do first.  I ask my kids which subject on which day; Geography/ Science/ History on Monday?  We then put our timetable up on the notice board.
• Plan one fun activity in each day.  We love brain gym and physical ed games. Art and crafts, nature walks are all added to the schedule.  If there is a fun activity, they will aim to complete the work quickly so they can enjoy that afterwards.  
• Create short lessons.  Make sure that lessons are not longer than 20 minutes.  Rather 2 minutes of perfect handwriting, than half an hour of sloppy worksheets.  The schedule is a guideline, not a task master, so it is fine if a year schedule takes 18 months, especially for young children!
• Use whatever method of motivation you find helps your children to complete work independently.  Many moms swear by the workbox method.  Others enjoy ticking off a task list when they have completed work.  Star charts work for some children.   Whatever method you chose, aim to bring your children to the place where they chose intrinsically to do the work excellently, quickly and independently.  
• Do difficult work in a new way.  Put aside workbooks and use other methods.  Play educational games.  Reinforce basics with fun drills.  Use songs to memorize.  Play with apparatus instead of paper and pen.  Go online and find some fascinating resources/ online game/ video.
• Stick to the  time limits.  Keep the lesson short and sweet.  Some kids are motivated if there is a timer and they stop when the bell rings.  Put aside incomplete work without a fuss.  Avoid nagging, shouting and insisting.  Tomorrow just start where you left off.  
• Keep one day of the week for informal studies/ nature studies/ music/ art or poetry.   Don’t do formal studies and writing at first.  Just whet their appetite and enjoy the experience.  Maybe informally discuss their experience.  Later, introduce notebook pages or add some technical aspects.  (I have lost one child to Charlotte Mason subjects because I was too formal and technical.  Now I approach these subjects gently and informally.)
• Review your week and plan for the next week.  Keep just one step ahead and your confidence and joy will keep you focused and motivated.
• Be prepared.  Set up the schoolroom the night before.  Put out a new activity or create a surprise.  Kids love this!  A simple encouraging note at their place will do wonders! You’ll also start the day with a twinkle in your eye!
• If things don’t work out, plan a “catch-up” week.  In one week you can catch up a whole term of a subject.  Have a “Music Monday” and dive in deep!  Do nature studies or science for a whole week.  If a subject was neglected,  consolidate and catch up in a week.  In fact, focusing on one subject for a week is very motivating!
• Plan an outing.  Go on a field trip.  Even a simple outing to a part or botanical garden can refresh and motivate everyone!
• Do school in a new place.  Move your desks, rearrange the space,  Have school in a park/ library/ botanical garden/ or under a tree.
• Join another homeschool family and do a hands-on project or an activity together. 
• Co-ops are great motivators!  One talented mom can give art or music lessons for the group and there will be no tears or tantrums with outsiders!
• Visit an expert or master craftsman.  Learn a skill from an expert.  Archery/ metalwork/ stained glass artwork or pottery classes can inject wonderful motivation to homeschool. (Only add this once the basics are well established and done with enthusiasm – see 2 and 3 in planning above.)

While most these thoughts have worked for me, I appreciate that every child and   family is unique.

The joy and blessing of homeschool is that you can tailor-make your schooling.  Children learn best when they use their natural learning style and study the topics that interest them.  A child who learns with joy and delight will tackle more challenging subjects with confidence.

Nothing in life and especially in homeschool is carved in stone!  My ideals have changed over the years.  Methods and approaches I once frowned upon, I now use and they serve their purpose – my children are learning and school is fun for all of us!

I trust that I may have encouraged you.  What works for you to turn  your frowns upside down?  Please share in the comments. 

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Blessings,

Motivation Within #2 Revisited

Previously I revisited Motivation Within #1  where I looked at intrinsic motivation.  

In this post, dusted off and renewed from my archives, I want to include some very practical suggestions, ideas and strategies .

There are many approaches and methods.  Some may work with very young children, but do not necessarily work with middle school children, and parents need new approaches when motivating young adolescents and teens.

Right upfront, I want you to know that I am not writing from a position of strength or success.   I am no expert.  My children are not perfect examples.  We are growing, learning, repenting, forgiving, praying and starting again.

Today I wish to share some ideas I gathered from several sources:

Caolan Madden of scholastic.com shared “10 Ways to Motivate Your Child to Learn” says:

1. Fill your child’s world with reading.
2. Encourage him to express his opinion, talk about his feelings, and make choices.  Ask for his comments on decisions, and show that you value it.
3. Show enthusiasm for your child’s interests and urge her to explore subjects that fascinate her.
4. Provide him with play opportunities that support different kinds of learning styles — from listening and visual learning to sorting and sequencing. 
5. Point out the new things you learn with enthusiasm. Discuss the different ways you find new information.
6. Ask about what he’s learning in school, not about his grades or test scores. “Even if he doesn’t do well grade-wise compared to the other students, he might still be learning and improving.”
7. Help your child organize her school papers and assignments so she feels in control of her work. If her task seems too daunting, she’ll spend more time worrying than learning.
8. Celebrate achievements, no matter how small. Completing a book report calls for a special treat; finishing a book allows your child an hour of video games. You’ll offer positive reinforcement that will inspire him to keep learning and challenging himself.
9. Focus on strengths, encouraging developing talents.
10. Turn everyday events into learning opportunities.

At teachkidshow.com they write “How to teach your child about motivation“.  They suggest that children are motivated in different ways during each phase of a child’s development:

Preschoolers

• Very young children learn about motivation by watching and listening to us.
• Thinking out loud can help kids know the “whys” behind things.
• Listening to your child and reflecting back to them what they’ve said will help them become aware of what motivates them.

Grade K – 3rd graders

• The need to be seen and heard is strong at this age.
• Motivation stemming from fear can explain some negative behaviors.
• Recognizing and encouraging your child’s natural bent and gifts can motivate them to succeed.

4th – 6th graders

• Success at something of personal interest and meaning is motivating.
• Listen to your child’s hopes and dreams without criticizing.
• Activities that touch the mind, heart and spirit motivate repeat experiences.
• Teach your child the power of their thoughts and words.

In an article Motivating Learning in Children, adapted from “Early Childhood Motivation“ from National Association of School Psychologists at nasponline.org, they suggest several strategies parents can use to help children remain more fully intrinsically motivated.  (I have added how Charlotte Mason’s  principles apply after each point)

•  Provide an environment that allows children to freely explore and to see the effect of their actions.

A Charlotte Mason education nourishes a child by great literature and great thoughts.  Her pupils spent their afternoons  in nature and enjoying free play.  

• Allow children ample time when working to allow for persistence.  Make sure that they can finish without interruption. Resist the natural urge to “help”.

Charlotte Mason stressed habits and character.  She wrote in Vol. 1, pg. 118 that, “Every day, every hour, the parents are either passively or actively forming that habits in their children upon which, more than upon anything else, future character and conduct depend.  It is necessary that the mother be always on the alert to nip in the bud the bad habit her children may be in the act of picking up from others.”  On dawdling she was most insistent that it is a “habit to be supplanted by the contrary habit,” and “once the habit is formed, it is very easy to keep it up.” (pg. 119)

• Respond to children’s needs in a consistent, predictable manner, but allow them to be as independent as possible. All children need clearly defined limits. Playtime, however, need not be structured and organized. Let your kid be a kid!

Ms. Mason is famous for her advice where she said, “The mother who takes pains to endow her children with good habits secures for herself smooth and easy days; while she who lets their habits take care of themselves has a weary life of endless friction with the children …” (Vol. 1, pg. 136)  From birth, a baby thrives in a secure schedule.  Young preschoolers are happiest with play, rest and good nutrition, simple days and a happy bedtime routine.

• Provide many opportunities for children and adults to explore together and interact directly. This lets you observe, model, and encourage your child.

Charlotte Mason advises parents to “personally know objects, or nature.” (Vol. 3, pg. 66) She advised that the parents enjoy discovery of nature together with their children.  Parents should read great books and discuss these thoughts and ideas together with their children.  Homeschool is the perfect environment for parents and children to learn and grow together.

• Provide situations that give children an acceptable challenge.  Activities that are slightly difficult for the child will be more motivating and provide for stronger feelings of success when accomplished. This may take some trial and error at first.

Ms. Mason frowned on textbooks, abridged books, “twaddle” and simplified titbits of information.  She advocated (in Vol. 6, pg. 140) that “We cannot give a better training in right reasoning than by letting children work out the arguments in favour of this or that conclusion.”

Narrations are a challenging skill required in a Charlotte Mason education.  In Vol. 3, pg. 191-192, she said, “From their earliest days they should get the habit of reading literature which they should take hold of for themselves, much or little, in their own way.”

• Give children opportunities to evaluate their own accomplishments. Rather than stating that you think they have done a good job, ask them what they think of their work. You’ll never go wrong by asking the question, “What do YOU think?”

Charlotte Mason said that, “No work should be given to a child that he cannot execute perfectly, and then perfection should be required of him as a matter of course.” (Vol 1, pg. 159)

• Do not use excessive rewards. They tend to undermine children’s ability to value themselves. Praise and rewards should be based upon children’s effort and persistence, rather than on the actual accomplishment.

Some closing thoughts on motivation:

• Be prepared – pray and plan before you start the day.
  
• Be firm and consistent – stick to the schedule and form good habits.
  
• Focus on short, clear goals – everyone must know what is required and how to get there.
  
• Use hands-on approach for young children – change tactics and methods for interest and variety of skills.
  
• Have fun learning together – cuddle while you read, smile and laugh while you learn, talk, discuss, listen to each other.  Share with dad.
  
• Be flexible – stop when before things get ugly.  Go on when things really sparkle!
  
• Focus on successes – remind them (and yourself) of what you have accomplished.
  
• Every day is a new beginning!  Start afresh.  Change approach or try again.

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Blessings,

Related Articles

• Five Reasons to Stop Saying “Good Job!” (alfiekohn.org)

Motivation Within #1 Revisited

Image via Wikipedia

Revisiting my archives ~

Charlotte Mason introduced a now famous motto,

“I am, I can, I ought, I will.”

Notice – every phrase starts with “I”.

Intrinsic motivation is found and sustained within the person.

Internal motivation does not need incentives from others.

When education is “an atmosphere, a discipline, a life,” Charlotte Mason points us to a higher form of education;

not just a learning process,

not related to classrooms, studies or methods,

not stars charts, percentages, grades and results,

but an attitude of learning

assisted by a character devoted to education as a part of the individual’s life.

Charlotte Mason called upon parents and teachers to inspire their children.

Star charts, sweets, stickers, grades, gifts and rewards are all lovely, but these are external motivation. Children enjoy these rewards because adults recognize and approve of them, and this kills their own love of learning and discovery.

These activities are “extrinsically motivated“.  The reward comes from outside the child and it has to be provided by someone, and has to be continually given for the child to stay motivated.

While it works, and for some children, has exceptional results and is enjoyable, it does not bring about the character traits I am trying to instill in my children; namely to bring them to desire to do their best and meet the highest for themselves.

I read an excellent article Motivating Learning in Children, adapted from “Early Childhood Motivation“ from National Association of School Psychologists at nasponline.org

“Young children learn from everything they do. They are naturally curious; they want to explore and discover. If their explorations bring pleasure or success, they will want to learn more. During these early years, children form attitudes about learning that will last a lifetime. Children who receive the right sort of support and encouragement during these years will be creative, adventurous learners throughout their lives.”

“Since intrinsically motivated activity is more rewarding in and of itself, children learn more from this sort of activity, and they retain that learning better. Intrinsically motivated children are more involved in their own learning and development. In other words, a child is more likely to learn and retain information when he is intrinsically motivated – when he believes he is pleasing himself.”

They go on to describe behavioural characteristics that show a high level of motivation in a child.  (And beneath each point I have added how Charlotte Mason’s principles encourage a high level of motivation.)

• Persistence –  A highly motivated child has the ability to stay with a task for a reasonably long time.

Ms. Mason advocated fairly short lessons.  She encouraged children to complete their work perfectly, with excellence.  She believed in discipline and developing good habits.

• Choice of challenge – Children who experience success in meeting one challenge will become motivated, welcoming another.

Ms. Mason’s education was built upon “Living Books”, exposing children to great ideas communicated by great minds, allowing the child to make relationships of these ideas.  She wanted minds to nourished upon great ideas. She did not want the educators writing ‘twaddle’ and simplify books for children.

• Dependency on adults – Children with strong intrinsic motivation do not need an adult constantly watching and helping with activities.

Ms. Mason insisted that the educator moved out of the way.  “Teaching must not be obtrusive.  Avoid lectures. Don’t get between the child and great minds.”  (Vol. 3, p. 66)  She did not want teachers to explain too much, nor give grades, or rewards.

• Emotion – Children who are clearly motivated will have a positive display of emotion. They are satisfied with their work and show more enjoyment in the activity.

A Charlotte Mason education provided children with short, happy lessons, and afternoons free for leisure.  Her education included great music and art, a love and appreciation for poetry and nature.  She encouraged the development of good habits.  Through narrations the child expressed his thoughts and ideas.  She said schoolwork should, “convey to the child such initial ideas of interest in his various studies as to make the pursuit of knowledge on those lines and object in life and a delight to him.” (Vol. 2, p. 247)

We need to differentiate between motivation through incentives or by inspiration.

We need to prayerfully ask the Lord to show us how we can inspire our children to say, “I am, I can, I ought, I will”

There is so much more!  Next post, I would like to discuss strategies to intrinsically motivate our children.

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Blessings,

Motivation Within (Part 2)

Image by Pink Sherbet Photography via Flickr

Last week I wrote about Motivation Within (Part 1) where I looked at intrinsic motivation.

In September I wrote a post Turning those Frowns Upside Down – Motivation! I believe that it included some very practical suggestions, ideas and strategies.

But as I pray, research, and read about motivation, I realise that there are so many approaches and methods.

The methods one may use with very young children do not necessarily work with middle school children, and parents need new approaches when motivating young adolescents.

To be honest, I am not writing from a position of strength or success.

I am no expert.

My children are not perfect examples.

We are growing, learning, repenting, forgiving, praying and trying anew.

Today I wish to share some ideas I gathered from several sources:

Caolan Madden of scholastic.com shared ~

10 Ways to Motivate Your Child to Learn

1. Fill your child’s world with reading.
2. Encourage him to express his opinion, talk about his feelings, and make choices. Ask for his comments on decisions, and show that you value it.
3. Show enthusiasm for your child’s interests and urge her to explore subjects that fascinate her.
4. Provide him with play opportunities that support different kinds of learning styles — from listening and visual learning to sorting and sequencing. 
5. Point out the new things you learn with enthusiasm. Discuss the different ways you find new information.
6. Ask about what he’s learning in school, not about his grades or test scores. “Even if he doesn’t do well grade-wise compared to the other students, he might still be learning and improving.”
7. Help your child organize her school papers and assignments so she feels in control of her work. If her task seems too daunting, she’ll spend more time worrying than learning.
8. Celebrate achievements, no matter how small. Completing a book report calls for a special treat; finishing a book allows your child an hour of video games. You’ll offer positive reinforcement that will inspire him to keep learning and challenging himself.
9. Focus on strengths, encouraging developing talents.
10. Turn everyday events into learning opportunities.

At teachkidshow.com they describe motivation as “that inner drive that inspires us to action; to make plans and follow through with them, based on specific elements of our self-concept. Getting positively motivated and staying that way engenders the energy behind positive action.”

They suggest that children are motivated in different ways during each phase of a child’s development:

Preschoolers

• Very young children learn about motivation by watching and listening to us.
• Thinking out loud can help kids know the “whys” behind things.
• Listening to your child and reflecting back to them what they’ve said will help them become aware of what motivates them.

Grade K – 3rd graders

• The need to be seen and heard is strong at this age.
• Motivation stemming from fear can explain some negative behaviors.
• Recognizing and encouraging your child’s natural bent and gifts can motivate them to succeed.

4th – 6th graders

• Success at something of personal interest and meaning is motivating.
• Listen to your child’s hopes and dreams without criticizing.
• Activities that touch the mind, heart and spirit motivate repeat experiences.
• Teach your child the power of their thoughts and words.

In an article Motivating Learning in Children, adapted from “Early Childhood Motivation” from National Association of School Psychologists they suggest ~

Several strategies parents can use to help children remain more fully intrinsically motivated.

(I had added how Charlotte Mason’s  principles apply)

• 

  Image by GrowWear via Flickr

  Provide an environment that allows children to freely explore and to see the effect of their actions.

A Charlotte Mason education nourishes a child by great literature and great thoughts.  Her pupils spent their afternoons running freely in nature and enjoying free play.  In Vol.2, pg. 247, she writes that, “Education is a life, nourished upon ideas; and education is an atmosphere – that is, the child breathes the atmosphere emanating from his parents; that of the ideas which rule their own lives.”

• Allow children ample time when working to allow for persistence.  Make sure that they can finish without interruption. Resist the natural urge to “help”.

Charlotte Mason stressed habits and character.  She wrote in Vol. 1, pg. 118 that, “Every day, every hour, the parents are either passively or actively forming that habits in their children upon which, more than upon anything else, future character and conduct depend.  It is necessary that the mother be always on the alert to nip in the bud the bad habit her children may be in the act of picking up from others.”  On dawdling she was most insistent that it is a “habit to be supplanted by the contrary habit,” and “once the habit is formed, it is very easy to keep it up.” (pg. 119)

• Respond to children’s needs in a consistent, predictable manner, but allow them to be as independent as possible. All children need clearly defined limits. Playtime, however, need not be structured and organized. Let your kid be a kid!

Ms. Mason is famous for her advice where she said, “The mother who takes pains to endow her children with good habits secures for herself smooth and easy days; while she who lets their habits take care of themselves has a weary life of endless friction with the children …” (Vol. 1, pg. 136)  From birth, a baby thrives in a secure schedule.  Young preschoolers are happiest with play, rest and good nutrition, simple days and a happy bedtime routine.

• Provide many opportunities for children and adults to explore together and interact directly. This lets you observe, model, and encourage your child.

Charlotte Mason advises parents to “personally know objects, or nature.” (Vol. 3, pg. 66) She advised that the parents enjoy discovery of nature together with their children.  Parents should read great books and discuss these thoughts and ideas together with their children.  Homeschool is the perfect environment for parents and children to learn and grow together.

• Provide situations that give children an acceptable challenge.  Activities that are slightly difficult for the child will be more motivating and provide for stronger feelings of success when accomplished. This may take some trial and error at first.

Ms. Mason frowned on textbooks, abridged books, “twaddle” and simplified titbits of information.  She advocated (in Vol. 6, pg. 140) that “We cannot give a better training in right reasoning than by letting children work out the arguments in favour of this or that conclusion.”

Narrations are a challenging skill required in a Charlotte Mason education.  In Vol. 3, pg. 191-192, she said, “From their earliest days they should get the habit of reading literature which they should take hold of for themselves, much or little, in their own way.”  When I read aloud to my children, they know that I will only read the passage once and they will retell it to me in as detailed and accurate way possible.  They have to concentrate, interpret and describe.

• Give children opportunities to evaluate their own accomplishments. Rather than stating that you think they have done a good job, ask them what they think of their work. You’ll never go wrong by asking the question, “What do YOU think?”

Charlotte Mason said that, “No work should be given to a child that he cannot execute perfectly, and then perfection should be required of him as a matter of course.” (Vol 1, pg. 159)

However, perfectionism is not encouraged.  I ask my children to chose and mark the perfect letter or word that they copied.  There is always something they find they did well even if the whole passage was not perfect.

• Do not use excessive rewards. They tend to undermine children’s ability to value themselves. Praise and rewards should be based upon children’s effort and persistence, rather than on the actual accomplishment.

At Mom Blog Network  What Motivates Our Children Part 1 the author concludes her post ~

“But what I think truly motivates our children is the same thing that motivates us…connection.

Connection to their own healthy sense of self.

Connection to their caregivers.

Connection to their peers and other important adults.”

Here are my closing thoughts on motivation:

• Be prepared – pray and plan before you start the day
  
• Be firm and consistent – stick to the schedule and your goals
  
• Focus on short, clear goals – everyone must know what is required and how to get there
  
• Use hands-on approach for young children – change tactics and methods for interest and variety of skills
  
• Have fun learning together – cuddle while you read, smile and laugh while you learn, talk, discuss, listen to each other.  Share with dad.
  
• Be flexible – stop when before things get ugly.  Go on when things really sparkle!
  
• Focus on successes – remind them (and yourself) of what you have accomplished.
  
• Every day is a new beginning!  Start afresh.  Change approach or try again.

There is so much more we can share on this topic.

Perhaps next week we can continue with some thoughts on praise and rewards.

Blessings,

Related Articles

• Five Reasons to Stop Saying “Good Job!” (alfiekohn.org)
• Helping Children (socyberty.com)

Motivation Within (Part 1)

Image via Wikipedia

Charlotte Mason introduced a now famous motto,

“I am, I can, I ought, I will.”

Notice – every phrase starts with “I”.

Intrinsic motivation is found and sustained within the person.

Internal motivation does not need incentives from others.

When education is “an atmosphere, a discipline, a life,” Charlotte Mason points us to a higher form of education;

not just a learning process,

not related to classrooms, studies or methods,

stars chart, percentages, grades and results,

but an attitude of learning

assisted by a character devoted to education as a part of the individual’s life.

Charlotte Mason called upon parents and teachers to inspire their children.

Star charts, sweets, stickers, grades, gifts and rewards are all lovely, but are external motivation. Children engage in activities because adults tell them to, or to please another party.

These activities are “extrinsic motivated.”  The reward comes from outside the child and it has to be provided by someone else, and has to be continually given for the child to stay motivated.

While it works, and for some children it has exceptional results and is enjoyable, I found that it does not bring about the character traits I am trying to instil in my children; namely to bring them to desire to do their best and meet the highest for themselves.

I read an excellent article Motivating Learning in Children,

adapted from “Early Childhood Motivation” from National Association of School Psychologists.

“Young children learn from everything they do. They are naturally curious; they want to explore and discover. If their explorations bring pleasure or success, they will want to learn more. During these early years, children form attitudes about learning that will last a lifetime. Children who receive the right sort of support and encouragement during these years will be creative, adventurous learners throughout their lives.”

“Since intrinsically motivated activity is more rewarding in and of itself, children learn more from this sort of activity, and they retain that learning better. Intrinsically motivated children are more involved in their own learning and development. In other words, a child is more likely to learn and retain information when he is intrinsically motivated – when he believes he is pleasing himself.”

Further on nasponline.org they describe behavioural characteristics that show a high level of motivation in a child.

(And beneath each point I have added how Charlotte Mason’s principles encourage a high level of motivation.)

• Persistence –  A highly motivated child has the ability to stay with a task for a reasonably long time.

Ms. Mason advocated fairly short lessons.  She encouraged children to complete their work perfectly, with excellence.  She believed in discipline and developing good habits.

• Choice of challenge – Children who experience success in meeting one challenge will become motivated, welcoming another.

Ms. Mason’s education was built upon “Living Books”, exposing children to great ideas communicated by great minds, allowing the child to make relationships of these ideas.  She wanted minds to nourished upon great ideas. She did not want the educators writing ‘twaddle’ and simplify books for children.

• Dependency on adults – Children with strong intrinsic motivation do not need an adult constantly watching and helping with activities.

Ms. Mason insisted that the educator moved out of the way.  “Teaching must not be obtrusive.  Avoid lectures. Don’t get between the child and great minds.”  (Vol. 3, p. 66)  She did not want teachers to explain too much, nor give grades, or rewards.

• Emotion – Children who are clearly motivated will have a positive display of emotion. They are satisfied with their work and show more enjoyment in the activity.

A Charlotte Mason education provided children with short, happy lessons, and afternoons free for leisure.  Her education included great music and art, a love and appreciation for poetry and nature.  She encouraged the development of good habits.  Through narrations the child expressed his thoughts and ideas.  She said schoolwork should, “convey to the child such initial ideas of interest in his various studies as to make the pursuit of knowledge on those lines and object in life and a delight to him.” (Vol. 2, p. 247)

We need to differentiate between motivation through incentives or by inspiration.

We prayerfully need to find out how we inspire our children to say, “I am, I can, I ought, I will”

There is so much more!  Next post, I would like to discuss strategies to intrinsically motivate our children.

If you are not subscribed, please click the  RSS Feed button or subscribe for email notification so that you catch the next post in this series.

Blessings,

Turning those frowns upside down – Motivation!

We have all had those days,

Where children frown,

have the sulks,

shed tears,

refuse,

delay and procrastinate,

whine and complain,

throw temper-tantrums,

and go so, so slow.

Homeschool moms who regularly experience these problems need to –

1. Assess

2. Plan

3. Motivate

Parents need to assess why a child is unhappy and unmotivated.

1. Is the negativity regular or consistent?
2. Is there a pattern of this behaviour?
3. Does this occur with all subjects or just some/one?
4. Is the child sick/ tired?
5. Has my child some physical problem that makes the learning difficult? Eyesight? Hearing? Low muscle tone? Any allergies?
6. Is my child too busy?
7. Are we over-scheduled?  Too many activities outside home?
8. What is my child’s preferred learning style?
9. Is my teaching method/ curriculum suited to my child’s learning style?
10. What motivates him/her?  How quickly does my child regain motivation?
11. Is the work level too high?  Is the work too difficult?
12. Am I requiring too much too soon?
13. Are there other underlying emotional problems that frustrate and anger my child?
14. Has the home routine been disrupted? New baby? A move?
15. Is there a loss of regular meal and sleep schedules?
16. Has the child recently been taken out of public school?  Does he/she need un-schooling?
17. What TV/ movies/ music/ peer friends / network group is my child involved in?
18. What are sibling relationships and family relationships like?
19. How much one-on-one time does my child have with parents?
20. Are parents experiencing difficulties?  Financial?  Marital?  Children are very sensitive to even unspoken stresses in the home.

When I assess, I pray to the Lord first.  I want His report.

Too often my own fears of inadequacy or uncertainty cloud my judgement.  When I pray and journal, the Lord encourages me.  He is my Hope.  His answers are often very simple.

When things are difficult at homeschool, I always talk to my husband.  He is not involved with much of the schooling/ curriculum/ methods/ principles, but he knows me.  He knows our children and he is the Head of our home.  We talk about the problems and possible solutions.  He and I assess together.  He is much more reluctant than I am to seek outside help, but if there are physical issues, we agree together to consult with the experts.

Establish the underlying problem/s, then plan and re-schedule –

1. Start the day with prayer.  Pray together.  Pray for each other.  Pray for strength to face any difficulty.
2. Keep at least 4 days (preferably 1 week) to the BARE ESSENTIALS.  Do not go out!  Do not entertain. Stay at home.
3. Re-introduce the basic routine.  Keep strict sleep times and healthy, happy meals times.
4. Keep school lessons short and sweet.
5. Start with the hardest subject first.
6. Use a different approach – do the work with drama/ movement/ puppet show/ songs/ actions/ fun activities.
7. Have a snack and tea break when desk work (3 R’s) is complete.
8. Continue with one enjoyable discovery subject (geography/ science/ history) per day.  Do it with minimum stress. Use delight-directed studies.
9. Finish school with a song as you pack away.  End the day happily.
10. Have a fun afternoon picnic/ swim/ game/ craft or activity/ go on a nature walk.  No books or work.  Keep it simple and fun.  Let them have free play outdoors.
11. Avoid all TV/ DVDs/ computer games for a week.  Play family games/ read aloud/ listen to classical music/audio books while doing a family collage/ project.
12. Introduce any healthy dietary changes gently if there were bad eating habits.
13. Introduce any therapy with a positive and gentle approach.
14. Be available in the day.  No blogging! Put aside your own activities or plan that the children join you in yours.  (Garden/ cook/ fold laundry together.)
15. Make bedtime simple, affectionate and whisper encouraging words in your child’s ear.  End the day with gratitude together.  Journal together or privately.  Rejoice over every victory.  (My younger children write to me in a special notebook and put it under my pillow.  I answer and write back and place it under theirs.  It has been our most precious and personal activity.)

Some encouraging ideas about motivation:

• Sit together with your children and ask them what they really like/ dislike.  Agree to do even the disliked subjects, but discuss how you can make it enjoyable.
• Plan your timetable together.  Let them choose with you.
  Although I plan the subjects and topics, we set up our timetable together.   If we need to do maths, spelling and writing for example, I let them decide which they do first.  I ask my kids which subject on which day; Geography/ Science/ History on Monday?  We then put our timetable up on the notice board.
• Put 1 fun activity in each day.  We love brain gym and physical ed games. Art and crafts, nature walks are all added to the schedule.  If there is a fun activity, they will aim to complete the work quickly so they can enjoy that afterwards.  (Even if you don’t use workboxes, these moms have fantastic fun activities, ideas and links.)
• Create short lessons.  Make sure that lessons are not longer than 20 minutes.  Rather 2 minutes of perfect handwriting, than half an hour of sloppy worksheets.  The schedule is a guideline, not a task master, so it is fine if a year schedule takes 18 months!
• Use whatever method of motivation you find helps your children to complete work independently.  Many moms swear by the workbox method.  Others enjoy ticking off a task listgifts/ sweets for completed work.  Star charts work for some children.  This is personal, but I have stopped extrinsic motivational methods.  Whatever method you chose, aim to bring your children to the place where they chose intrinsically to do the work excellently, quickly and independently. for the day.  Some moms use surprise
• Do difficult work in a new way.  Put aside workbooks and use other methods.  Play educational games.  Reinforce basics with fun drills.  Use songs to memorize.  Play with apparatus instead of paper and pen.  Go online and find some fascinating resources/ online game/ video.
• Stick to the  time limits.  Keep the lesson short and sweet.  Time the lesson, then stop when time is up.  Put aside incomplete work without a fuss.  Avoid nagging, shouting and insisting.  Tomorrow just start where you left off.
• Keep one day of the week for informal studies/nature studies/ music/ art and poetry.  We all look forward to high tea and poetry!  Don’t do formal studies and writing at first.  Just whet their appetite and enjoy the music or art.  Talk.  Discuss.  Later introduce notebook pages and some technical aspects.  (I have lost one child to nature journalling because I was too formal and technical.  Now I approach nature journalling gently and informally.)
• Review your week and plan for the next week.  Keep just 1 step ahead and your confidence and joy will keep you focused and motivated.
• Be prepared.  Set up the schoolroom the night before.  Put out a new activity or create a surprise.  Kids love this!  A simple encouraging note at their place will do wonders! You’ll also start the day with a twinkle in your eye!
• If things don’t work out, plan a Catch-up week.  In 1 week you can catch up a whole term of a subject.

  Have a “Music Monday” and dive in deep!  Do nature studies and science for a whole week.  I have stressed about a subject we neglected,  but we consolidated, caught up and re-captured. At the end of a week’s study of a composer or artist and his works, the children know and recognise that artist.  Doing a whole week of science experiments was fantastic!  Every day became an adventure!) our love and enjoyment.  In fact, focusing on 1 subject for a week is very motivating!

• Plan an outing.  Go on a school trip.
• Do school in a new place.  Hold school in a park/ library/ botanical garden/ under a tree.
• Join another homeschool family and do a hands-on project together.  (We once built a raft using logs on the beach after a flood and rowed up the river estuary! Something I would never have done on my own.)
• Co-ops are great motivators!  One talented mom can give art or music lessons for the group and there will be no tears or tantrums with outsiders!
• Visit an expert or master craftsman.  Learn a skill from an expert.  Archery/ metalwork/ stained glass artwork or pottery classes can inject wonderful motivation to homeschool. (Only add this once the basics are well established and done with enthusiasm – see 2 and 3 in planning above.)

While most these thoughts have worked for me, I appreciate that every child and family is unique.

The joy and blessing of homeschool is that you can tailor-make your schooling.  Children learn best when they use their natural learning style and study the topics that interest them.  A child who learns with joy and delight will tackle more challenging subjects with confidence.

Nothing in life and especially in homeschool is carved in stone!  My ideals have changed over the years.  Methods I once frowned upon, I now use and they serve their purpose – my children are learning and school is fun for all of us!

I trust that I may have encouraged you.

What works for you to turn those frowns upside down?

Blessings,