Much of what I share here on Practical Pages showcases “what works”, but I acknowledge that I am definitely not a supermom and our homeschooling was often less than perfect!
Here’s another “Getting Real” topic ~ Disappointments
Unmet expectations often lead to disappointments. Repeated disappointments can in turn lead to depression, despair and hopelessness.
So let’s talk about unmet homeschool expectations.
Most new homeschool parents trust that the curriculum they purchased will be a “good fit”. Many homeschool parents have an ideal of their children sitting and learning happily every day. Many parents hope that they will have well-grounded, well-rounded and well-mannered children who will reflect the all benefits of homeschooling, but this is often not the case.
There are many failures, flops, and fears. Expensive curriculums don’t suit a child’s learning style. Some subjects are unpleasant. Some lessons are too difficult.
You can read my post on “Unmet Expectations” where I shared how I found myself “floundering under the weight of my lofty ideals and unrealistic homeschooling expectations” in my first years of homeschooling.
I remember my deep disappointment when my young teenage daughters refused to do most of the Charlotte Mason subjects such as Hymn study, Composer study and Nature Study when they started high school. Here’s an excerpt describing my disappointment ~
“You see, I wanted that cozy picture of my girls all singing hymns, sketching birds and butterflies and sweetly reciting poems. I hoped they would all know at least 31 scriptures and could recite quotes from living books. Charlotte Mason is so much deeper and wider than subjects and principles, so why is it such a struggle in my home?”
I had encouraged my children regarding their choices and attitudes. I had tried to inspire them and pushed and persuaded them, but many times I watched as they refused, or failed. Despite my best efforts, when I tried to force a child to do something they do not want to do, it did not lead to success. In my worst moments, I judged myself and felt judged by others for these disappointment. I have experienced seasons of depression and even despair at these times.
Children may delay, procrastinate or refuse to do their work. Children who struggle a lot become disillusioned because they feel that they have not achieved what their parents expect from them. This disillusionment creates a block to learning. Before they even try, they feel “I can’t”.
This homeschool journey often includes failures and disappointments. We are given moment-by-moment choices, and many times we make choices out of fear and not because we have faith.
May I encourage you to turn to the Lord in times of disappointment. Ask Him to show you the situation through His eyes. Trust Him to help you find another way. Pray for grace to accept situations you cannot change. Pray for the grace to surrender and the wisdom to learn.
Sending you huge hugs as you face your disappointments. Please feel free to share your experiences or advice in the comments.
Blessings and grace in these real moments,