Although I love to share what works here on Practical Pages, I acknowledge that I am definitely not a supermom and our homeschooling is often less than perfect! I have shared many of these posts in my “Getting Real” series.
Here’s another “Getting Real” moments in our homeschooling ~ Terrible doubts
We all suffer from self-doubts, but as homeschooling moms, an unhappy child, a child struggling with learning or with fears within themselves, where we feel powerless to help — these thoughts and feelings fill a parent with thoughts of doubt and anxiety. You’ve heard the sister concepts — doubts & fears. They often go hand-in-hand.
This is a terrible ‘sickness’ which can drain all the joy from our role as teacher and mom, and can negatively impact all our relationships.
My first year of homeschooling was filled with uncertainties, anxieties and a desperate desire to make the right choices, to provide everything I felt my children needed and to “do it the right way”. I was uncertain about my curriculum choices, fearful about how to present the lessons so that my children both loved them and learnt through them, and I was doubtful that I could teach my youngest child to read. I won’t even describe the doubts I had about homeschooling my children through high school!
Due to these doubts and fears, our first year’s homeschool days were filled with my sense of urgency and desperation. My striving and desire for perfection caused so much tension. This often led to conflict with my strong-willed child. These conflicts caused further self-doubt and damaged my self-esteem and confidence as a parent. Oh boy, that first year was a disaster, emotionally.
Fear is often manifest in anger. Whenever you are angry at a situation, stop to ask, “What am I most fearful of right now?” Turn that fear into a prayer and wait for the grace, strength and wisdom of the Lord to guide you through that situation.
Looking back over 22 years of homeschooling I can honestly see that GRACE is powerful! Grace towards yourself — for not knowing, for being unsure, for being afraid. Grace towards your child — for their struggles and fears. Grace for fresh beginnings. Grace for new starts. Grace to try new ways. Grace to trust the Lord. Grace to discover, explore and grow without definite expectations.
Homeschooling is a journey of discovery. Homeschooling in grace may even look like you are “failing”. But, I encourage you to extend grace to yourself and to others so that you can grow and develop. It will work out. You’ll be fine! The Lord will not fail you!
Please feel free to share your experiences or advice in the comments.
Blessings and grace in these real moments,